Hi folks. Long time, no blog. Again, there’s a reason for that.
You’d have to be living under a rock lately to not realize that a lot of shit has been happening in the last couple of months. Personal stuff. Big stuff. Newsworthy stuff. A bunch of stuff that really gets my blood pressure up.
And there’s the problem. It’s difficult for me to be writing about games I like (Minecraft, EVE) and games I had a hard time liking (Earthrise), babbling on about my struggles writing, chatting about the lattes I make when there’s serious events happening in my life and in the world itself.
Part of me wants to write those little fluff pieces anyway. Part of me wants to rage against the world I’m seeing unfold before me. In the end, my mind poses the question “there’s so many issues out there that need addressing, serious issues and you’re going to write about what exactly?”
I don’t fool myself. I don’t have a large audience. February was an emotionally brutal month, March isn’t looking that much better and beyond some cathartic relief, I’m not sure what I can accomplish by wailing against the wall, yelling at cyberspace for someone to listen. The largest drivers I’ve had to the site have been where I said I don’t like something rather than the positive articles.
So I freeze. I completely lock up shop and take a hiatus without word one to anyone who might be watching the site. I’ve never quite been sure that I want this site to be just an online diary, I’d like it to be something more. What that is, I’m not sure. I don’t want it to be where I log on and bitch about stuff I don’t like, because who is that helping?
If you’ve read this far, it may sound like I’m stepping back. I’m not. I had to get this off my chest to get back to blogging. Somehow, I realized today that this small corner of the net is my voice and either I have to keep on doing my thing or pick up the soapbox and head home…and I’m not ready to head home yet.
Was this a bit of a diary entry? Maybe. But that’s what you’re going to get sometimes. It’s just who I am.